8 Things That Happen When You Plan Your Kid’s 1st Birthday Party

You did it. You kept a human alive and thriving for 365 days. After 525,600 minutes, glasses of wine and Google searches, it all comes down to this: the 1st birthday party.

Is it for them? For instagram likes? Or an excuse for you to drink champagne and cry? I’ll be honest, I’m not sure. But I these 8 things will totally happen in the process.

You’ll Spend His College Fund.

The very little that you started to save in the first place will be gone. Consider that piggy bank smashed. Do you know how much a helium tank goes for these days? More importantly, did you know rock candy costs as much as a helium tank? It doesn’t matter, you need all of it.

You’ll become an expert on things you never thought you’d care about.

The average life expectancy of a mermaid is 36. Chicken noodle soup that was flown on Apollo 11 is worth more than your life. Unicorns fart glitter. The first dinosaur to be formally named was the Megalosaurus. This party will be authentic AF.

You’ll ruin your walls.

Kiss your security deposit goodbye. Your landlord will be convinced you threw a Keg & Eggs banger, not a Pancake and Pajamas soiree that wrapped up by nap time. There’s 923 variations of the Command hook, yet none can hold your balloon garland just right. Stick to a hammer and some duct tape–literally–and it’ll look like you hired a professional.

You’ll forget it’s your birthday, too.

Last year you planned a trip to Vegas to see BSB front row. That trip was cancelled once you did the math and realized you’d be 36 weeks pregnant at showtime, but you always did it big.  This year you listen to their new album while you curate the perfect collection of moon rocks for your little dude’s big day. With a glass–or 12–of wine, of course.

You’ll invite someone you met once.

The kid with the rash from your trial swim class, your downstairs neighbor you’ve never spoken too, the cashier at the grocery store. They’re all invited. This is your baby’s FIRST BIRTHDAY and everyone’s coming.

You’ll convince yourself that there must be a petting zoo.

It will not matter if you’re celebrating at a princess tea party…there will be goats. And pigs. And giraffes if you know the right people.

You’ll cry. A lot.

That’s your baby. You literally just met that mush 5 minutes ago and now they’re double fisting smash cakes. What an amazing and heartbreaking feeling all mixed into one. Time surely flies, everyone warned you.

For out of this world party ideas, visit Momo Party!

You’ll party hard.

Once you wipe the tears off of your face and custom NASA jacket, it’s time to celebrate. You literally watched a tiny person you made change and grow for an entire year. Drink it all in, and drink champagne.

Whether you celebrate with some extra snuggles before work, or you erect an entire circus tent and hire Raffi, this is a day you’ll never forget.

I don’t think the collections calls will ever let me forget it.

Mother Christmas: DIY Ugly Maternity Sweater

Hot chocolate runs through my veins. I take the holidays very seriously, and with a tiny snowflake on the way, my spirit is off the charts.  Even if I didn’t have an official event to wear this to, I’d make it and go to the grocery store.

There are a ton of “round” themed holiday items to pick from when faced with making a maternity ugly sweater. Snowman, wreath, ornament, snow globe, the last dozen cookies I inhaled. Snow globe, yes!

Initially I had a problem with all the supplies being “ugly,” but I quickly reminded myself that was the whole point. I’m wearing this to an ugly sweater party, and I didn’t actually have to be seen at the grocery store in it. Once I accepted that, I filled my Dollar Tree cart with all gaudy tinsel and garland.

  • Shirt or sweater
  • Plastic wrap
  • Glue gun and glue sticks
  • Scissors
  • Chalk
  • Everything and anything to set the scene in your snow globe! I found fake snow, ornaments, tinsel and foam crafts at Dollar Tree.

Click through the gallery for a very professional tutorial!

 

Under 10: DIY Baby Mama Ornament

Growing up, one of my favorite holiday traditions was unpacking all of my family ornaments to hang on the tree. No matter how many years I unwrapped the same ones, I’d always get the same warm feeling as if I was seeing my great grandmother’s crocheted outhouse for the very first time.  An ornament that always stuck out to me was a pregnant Momma bunny (LOL, what?) that my own Momma got when she was pregnant with me. It was so special to hang up every year and I always hoped to find something just like it when I was starting my own family. Of course I couldn’t find any “expecting” ornaments this year, and definitely not a bunny with a baby bump, so I decided to take things into my own puffy hands.

Whether you started decking the halls before Halloween or are skipping the tree altogether and decorating a pineapple instead, there’s room for this sweet little ornament in everyone’s holiday traditions. Not only can you get it done in less than 10 minutes, it’ll cost you less than $10, and your skill set doesn’t need to be anywhere near a level 10.

  • Wooden Ornament-any shape will do just fine! I found this heart that already had the intentions of becoming some type of ornament at Michaels.
  • Paint Marker(s)
  • Mini Cookie Cutters
  • No idea why the scissors are in the picture, didn’t use ’em!

  • Undo the twine or ribbon on your ornament
  • Grab a paint marker, write “Cookie Baking” and the year if you’re feelin’ it…
  • Using the original twine or ribbon, fasten the mini cookie cutter to the wooden ornament

For under $10 in less than 10 minutes, this is a sweet treat you can make for all the expecting bunnies on your list.

P.S. I totally found an ornament in Target as soon as I hung this baby on our tree. Yes, I bought it, and I can’t wait for our son to help hang them both on our family tree for many years to come.